Last night was bittersweet. Downside: Away from home. Upside: Time to clear my mind of all the negative from the past week. Sometimes a good meltdown is needed.
As I arrived in Arizona I was brought back to my college days. During the summer after high school my mother gave me the choice to stay in Montreal or move to West Virginia with her and the rest of the family. Of course I decided to stay… I had too much to lose. I had Tyler, my recent admission into college and a stable job.
Forgive me if my grammar is brutal and the layout sucks. I am using my phone to post for the very first time. I have ten minutes left before my shuttle arrives but I feel the need to share my mind struggles.
Anyway, flashback 2 Christmas’ ago… It was my first Christmas with out my large family. No siblings and no grandparents. It felt good to share some quality time with dad but let’s be honest. Traditions are hard to part with, especially when it involves your siblings. It was a difficult year but Christmas really took a toll on me. I wasn’t ready to lose my family. Once the Christmas rush was finished at work I took a long drive to West Virginia and stayed for 2 weeks. It was the first time since convocation that I had seen my mom.
Later that year, mom discussed moving closer to home. It was too difficult to stay in touch and see each other. In the midst of all things… my step father was offered another contract but this time it was in Arizona. Just when I thought I’d spend NEXT Christmas with everyone they were considering Tucson.
Mom got on a flight to PHX. Visited for a week or so and fell in love. I was sure we would be doomed.
To make a long story short, they never ended up moving. The contract was taken by someone else and my step father had agreed to move closer.
Last night however, every emotion I had two years ago enveloped my heart while my current struggles over whelmed me. It’s funny… As I stepped out of the airport I thought to myself “Hmm… This is where mom would have been spending Christmas had the timing worked out”
I don’t know what this post was supposed to be about but unfortunate I am out of time. Five hour flight here I come. PHX-YYZ here I come. I can not wait to get home to Tyler! I need to cuddle and share what’s on my mind 🙂
Have a great day my friends…. till next time!